College Isn't For Everyone, Kids

I have a terrible memory. I've probably shared that before, but I don't remember. There are certain situations or conversations that stick out to me from my past because they have been life altering for me. This situation is one of them...

I vividly remember standing there, as a nearly graduated-early senior, talking to a teacher about my future plans. Mind you, I just had a baby within the same month I graduated early. My grades were above average. I was adjusting to a new normal. A new life of being a mom, at age 18. "Future plans" involved coming up with a way to get more sleep... Not getting mastitis again... And figuring out what part my baby's daddy was going to play in this elusive future. I just had a baby. She was weeks old. She was my world. She was my future. I remember telling this teacher a little of that and he looked stunned. "...you mean, you're not thinking about college??"

I would be lying if I said I wasn't offended by this conversation. As if my life was over without going to college. As if making it through high school wasn't an accomplishment. As if being a mother was petty and not setting my standards high enough.

Yes, I get it. College is "the holy grail", the reason for doing well in high school, the springboard for your future. At least, that's what everyone seems to think. College is really put on a pedestal. Now, don't get me wrong, my dear husband went to college, got his masters' in 5 years and has a successful job that he loves. But, that's not how it goes for everyone... I have several friends that went to college because "that's what you do". That's how you make your family proud. They picked a major because the classes worked with their schedule and it seemed like a legit way to make money someday. But that's not their reality now. They spent thousands of dollars, most STILL paying off that debt, to get a degree for a job they will never find. Some even returned to school to get a different, more practical degree.

It has taken me years and much love and encouragement from my husband to say this: My greatest accomplishment in this life is being a mom. Take that, former high school teacher. College truly is not for everyone. Motherhood is not for everyone. But it is for me. I don't need a piece of paper from a university to validate my worth. I find more glory, more pride, more refinement, more "life-experience" in being a mother than I could have ever expected a university to give me. And while, yes, it may cost even more than getting a degree, I love that my "job" every single day is to pour out love to these babies of mine. To teach them. To keep them safe. To give them opportunities. To tell them things like "College isn't for everyone, kids." I want them to know that success isn't defined by grades, scores and passing or failing a class. Success comes in so many different forms. I want to show them that fulfillment doesn't come from books and other people, but that it comes from knowing God and following His plan for your life-- whatever that may be.

If I were to see this teacher now, I would beam with pride at all that I have accomplished. I would proudly tell him that I did not go to college. And that I am working on my "4th masters' degree" as a mom. I love what I do and I would tell my 18 year old self... "Your future is even better than you can imagine."