Teen Mom

No, this post is not about that show on MTV. Although, I must say that I have watched that show and my heart hurts for those girls. They are just so lost and have no identity, it seems. And I am so, so glad that I was grounded enough to realize what I needed to do and had the perfect people around me to support me and help me be the best teen mom I could be. 

Hubby and I on Cadee Grace's birth day 12/1/04

Senior Prom- April 2005

What being a teen mom taught me...

Being a teen mom taught me, first and foremost, that there are absolutely consequences for every action. Good or bad. Is Cadence a consequence? Yes, but I feel like she is a good one. Some of the ugly consequences were... damaging relationships. Between me and my family, me and my now in-laws, me and some of my friends who may have looked to me for advice. I still see the effects of this today. And it still breaks my heart.
Another consequence would be that I missed out on SO much of being a teenager. While everyone else enjoyed their senior prom and after prom party, I was sore from not feeding my baby and I wondered how she was every second of that night. It was hard for me to be the care-free teenager when I had so many other things to think about.
Having a baby at the age of 18 definitely changed Hubby and I's relationship. It made us both step back and go- whoa. We have to grow up. And NOW. And we need to decide quickly if we want to do it together or make it work separately. Thank God that I was dating a man that suffers from extreme loyalty. And he was all in with Cadence from day 1. (How could he not be? She melts everyone's heart! Still does!!)
Those are just a FEW consequences! I won't go into the toll it took on my body, my (lack thereof) checkbook and all the trust that I spent 18 hard years of earning from my parents!

Baby Cadence and I

Being a teen mom taught me unconditional love at it's finest. Unconditional love from my Heavenly Father, my family, and from me to my baby girl. From the second she was born, I felt an unbelievably strong pull to this baby. And I knew I would do everything I could to make her life perfect. To make sure she new her daddy and paternal grandparents. To make sure that she felt loved at all times, no matter what. And to make sure that she understood that she is not a mistake. She is a blessing.

Nana and girls

Being a teen mom gave me a huge appreciation for MY mom! No, she was not a teen mom, but I was at that time in my life where I didn't think I needed her. And having a baby erased that feeling completely!! Not only did I need her support (emotionally and physically) and help with Cadee, but I also needed her wisdom. She LITERALLY taught me everything I know about taking care of a baby. I would not be a good mother without her presence in my life. And this still rings true. I appreciate her everytime one of the girls pitches a fit at the store, or sasses off, or changes their outfit for the third time that day or refuses to eat the dinner I made. I text my mom and I say- "thank you so much for doing all of my ridiculous laundry" or "I am sorry for the times I acted like this". 

Being a teen mom taught me that there is so much more to this life than high school. It's very easy to get caught up in the attitude of a teenager and what I wanted for MY life. But from the second I found out I was pregnant with Cadee Grace, it snapped me out of that mindset and into thoughts of- what can I do for HER? I no longer cared about what people said or thought of me (if I did, it would have ruined me entirely). My true friends are now my kids' Uncles and Aunts. They are that dear to me for sticking through it with me and being there for me for every single second. (I love telling Cadee about the slumber parties she used to be at with me and my two best friends.) And, the members of my family (immediate, in laws and my parents and siblings) are what matter most to me. Because at the end of the day, they are always going to be there for me.

Cadence Grace

Being a teen mom was HARD. It still is! I may not be a teen mom now, but I am a 25 year old raising a 7 year old! That has challenges all it's own! Not to mention, when Cadee was little, I was focused more on being her friend and companion instead of her mom. That's why she acts just like me. (Poor thing.) I am still a pushover when it comes to her. But in all sincerity. that little girl is the reason I have everything I have. My husband, my Lili, my baby boy, my relationship with my mom, dad and sister now and some of the BEST mom friends that a girl could ask for. Who knows which path my life would have taken without her! She put a RUSH on everything I had planned for my life. Yes, it's hard. But, man! What a blessing in disguise.
My song for Cadence is "Unanswered Prayers" by Garth Brooks. I cannot tell you how many times I prayed NOT to be pregnant. As awful as that sounds, I was scared out of my mind! Once I found out, my prayer changed, of course. And to this day, I am still thankful that God's plan was bigger for my life. I missed out on college, yes. But I can always go back. And Hubby reminds me quite often that he is glad I didn't spend a ton of money to go to college if my true passion was staying home and taking care of my family. I'm still earning my degree for that!
This is MY story. I don't encourage others to try it. I know how incredibly blessed I am to have my family. They are my spoonful of sugar. They make everything sweeter. Are there times I want to send everyone to bed and lock myself in my room? Maybe. But would I trade my life for anything? No. Most days are full of giggles, playing babies, pirates or Sorry, butt hugs, belly kisses, Lili logic, sweet good morning lovies, and plenty of snuggles. I couldn't imagine a sweeter life. Even if it was rushed.

Lili, Hubby and Cadee